Use of Gourmet Salts in Broiler Meat Production to Maintain High Demand in Meat and Poultry Division

Use of Gourmet Salts in Broiler Meat Production to Maintain High Demand in Meat and Poultry Division

RSS Use of Gourmet Salts in Broiler Meat Production to Maintain High Demand in Meat and Poultry Division Gourmet salts are naturally harvested sea salts that contain low sodium levels. The demand for these salts is relatively high across the globe with consumers shifting their food patterns towards consumption of healthy alternatives over their conventional counterparts.
Valley Cottage, Gourmet salts are naturally harvested sea salts that contain low sodium levels. The demand for these salts is relatively high across the globe with consumers shifting their food patterns towards consumption of healthy alternatives over their conventional counterparts. Burgeoning demand for gourmet salts is predominantly due to rapid globalization, growing awareness of consumers, and frequent innovation in ingredients and flavors. Evolving lifestyles and food habits of consumers compel them to prefer healthy food choices, strongly backed by their increasing per capita expenditure. Urbanization plays a pivotal role in influencing the lifestyle and consumption patterns among consumers, worldwide. Owing to the employment prospects, migration of the working population to Tier-1 cities has increased extensively, which is expected to continue over the coming years. Increasing awareness among consumers about food products and their contents has been attributed to exploding Internet penetration, mushrooming infiltration of electronic gadgets, and burgeoning use of social media. While online promotion strategies contribute a lion’s share in boosting the popularity of organically-sourced food products, the food and beverages industry has been witnessing reorganization in recent years. Salts form a noteworthy part of a meal and are available extensively, after a series of processes in food processing factories. However, growing consumer inclination towards consuming food products in their natural form is expected to push the sales of gourmet salts over the forecast period. Request Report TOC @ https://www.persistencemarketresearch.com/methodology/2807 The retail sector also plays a prominent role in influencing the changing consumption pattern. The expansion of the global retail chain has triggered the use of different food and beverage products, owing to improved strategies being adopted by key stakeholders, for product promotion and consumer outreach. Use of gourmet salts in broiler meat production to maintain high demand in meat and poultry division To decrease the sodium content in meat products, processors are probing for a replacement for sodium chloride that possesses similar functionality, without compromising on the quality of sensory attributes. One idea that meat scientists are pursuing is the use of alternative gourmet salts, which are not purified and thus, contain several trace elements. A recent study demonstrates the similarities between the functionality of potassium chloride and sodium chloride with respect to their effects on muscle enzymes, which will possibly trigger demand for gourmet salts in the meat and poultry division. Request for sample report: https://www.persistencemarketresearch.com/samples/2807 Bakery and confectionery are expected to maintain the second position in terms of gourmet salts consumption Gourmet salts are found in different forms such as flake salts, fleur de sel, Italian sea salt, sel gris, smoked sea salt, Indian black salt, coarse salts, and others such as Himalayan pink salt, and specialty flavored salt. Fleur de sel has a distinct taste and is used in several cuisines along with coarse salts, especially in bakery products. As they are healthy and organic in nature, the demand for gourmet salts is expected to gain traction in the bakery and confectionery division in the coming years. Media Relations Contact

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Ingredients in UAE mostly come from India, says UAE’s first female chef Khulood Atiq Saeed

New Delhi [India], Mar 2 (ANI): Food ingredients, mostly spices, come from India, which makes the Emirati cuisine taste almost similar to the Indian cuisine , shared Khulood Atiq Saeed , the first female chef from the United Arab Emirates ( UAE ).
Attending an international food festival hosted by the Embassy of UAE in New Delhi in collaboration with multiple Embassies of other countries, including France, Tunisia, Czech Republic, Hungary and others, on Friday, Saeed told ANI, “We don’t have any ingredients in our country. Most of the spices come from India. So you can see the Emirati food and Indian food is similar.”
“Few differences are however noted in the taste because we use less chilli in our food . But today it was a combination of both cuisine s. I made the Emirati stew and used the Indian ‘Rumali Roti’ as the bread to go with it,” Saeed added.
The celebrity chef further went on stating that Indian food was one of her favourites in the list.
“I am excited to see more recipes and spices in the food festival. In my country, we have some Indian food but it is not the same here because you have a huge number of recipes. I have time here and so, I went to the kitchen and saw the chef preparing few of the Indian dishes,” Saeed said.
When asked to elaborate on her journey of becoming the first female iconic chef from the UAE , Saeed remarked that her career started in 2006.
“Initially many people had commented that how are you going to work with your abaya along with so many men around you. But now those people are proud of me because today I not only cook but also write the Emirati cookbooks. I do lots of episodes on the local television channels and visit around the world to promote the Emirati food ,” Saeed noted. (ANI)

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Quote: : I’m going to make a couple leaps of logic to try to explain what may be happening here.
A key piece of data that’s missing is what 35-54 year old Gen X’ers are doing. That’s vital because most retirees tend to want to relocated where their children are so they can be active grandparents and have their children look after them as they age. If retirees are not moving here as much, that leads me to believe their Gen X children are not moving to Atlanta, or if they’re already here, they are saying, “Please don’t move here, we probably aren’t going to stay much longer” to their parents.
Also, I think it’s incredibly important to look at what young people are doing. If you were a college graduate today, and you had your choice of where to live, how high would Atlanta be? I think we’re in much worse shape than we were 20 years ago. In 1999, we were still riding the Olympic wave, Buckhead and VaHi had thriving night life districts, and midtown had the urban vibe with a few great night clubs.
What do we have now? Well, we have a Beltline, food halls, and condos. That’s great… but it’s also generic. How many other cities have similar amenities? And then other things we don’t have?
I think what we’re seeing is the result of a slow burn. People who moved here due to hype in the late 90s/early 2000s. Over time, they maybe realized it’s not so great here. Maybe they got good jobs here, but stalled on an upward trajectory and had to move for better opportunities. Maybe they got sick of traffic. Maybe it just wasn’t for them.
I said I was making a few leaps of logic. However, my perspective on Atlanta’s future is probably more bleak than most people here simply because I think other cities are developing in more interesting and unique ways, offering better lifestyles for most people. Of course, that’s all opinion. The key thing we need are great employment centers for people like me — and I think MANY people are in my situation: I never actually WANTED to move to Atlanta, it’s just where I got the best job opportunity.
If we actually do lose Turner entertainment in the AT&T talks, it’s going to be a devastating blow. Not only is it a large employer, more importantly, it employs the creative class. I feel it matters less to lose 2000 AT&T employees doing whatever they do than losing 2000 arts and entertainment workers who bring art and culture to the city. Just my thoughts. Interesting perspective.
I’m a Gen X’er who moved here for employment, but also first considered moving here around 8 years ago. I live in North Fulton, so while I like the proximity to Atlanta itself, I don’t feel I need to be living right IN Atlanta.
I’m also past the stage where nightclubs and the singles bars attract me…but some good restaurants? Different types of cuisine? Count me in. Finally getting good Indian food again.
But I’m also in FinTech, which is a hot area for Atlanta and North Fulton.
For the first time ever, I feel that this is where I want to stay for the rest of my life. And I’ve lived in 3 countries and 4 states in the US.

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This Takeaway Dice Could End Weekend Food-Decision Arguments

11 hours ago 1 Shares This Takeaway Dice Could End Weekend Food-Decision Arguments Fri Mar 01 2019 11:46:11 GMT+0000 (GMT) Fri Mar 01 2019 12:56:23 GMT+0000 (GMT) Amelia Jones Amelia Jones in Tasty Powered by
Remember that scene in Gavin & Stacey? Yeh, you do. Smithy gets a little carried away with his Indian takeaway order and then refuses to share? Standard.
And before you decide what you want to order from the restaurant comes the minefield of picking a cuisine. You’ve already decided how many times to snooze your alarm this morning, what to wear today, whether to go to work or not: enter decision fatigue. But this game-changing dice will take the decision making out of the equation and bring peace to your takeaway supper arguments once and for all. Credit: ASOS
The Gift Republic Take-away Decision Dice, £3.99 from ASOS , is the clever little device you didn’t know you needed.
Just throw the dice and, instead of numbers, the cute cartoon food images ‘takeaway’ the burden on making food decisions.
Options include a burger , pizza, pan Asian, chicken, a dish (which we assume contains curry) and a burrito.
Consider the decision made for you.
On the subject of decision fatigue – KFC & Pizza Hut created a mash up this February that means nobody misses out on their favourite fast food. Introducing: the Gravy Supreme. Credit: ASOS
The pair of fast food giants joined forces to make the magic happen for #NationalPizzaDay, but what is the Gravy Supreme?
Gather round, kids – consider this an education. The Gravy Supreme is a mash up of some of the hero items from each of the fast-food restaurants’ menus. Essentially it’s a Cheesy Bites pizza smothered in KFC gravy and topped with The Colonel’s Popcorn chicken pieces, mozzarella, sweet corn and garlic sprinkles.
While not available to the public yet (sorry), the Frankenstein’s- monster-of-a-pizza is in the process of being tested and trialled by Pizza Hut Delivery and KFC’s chief innovators to make sure it’s as tasty as can be. It’s #NationalPizzaDay and alongside @PizzaHutDeliver we’ve been concocting what can only be classified as a work of art.The Gravy Supreme. Do we even need to ask if you’d buy it..? :pizza::poultry_leg: pic.twitter.com/eVLzzz4MkC – KFC UK & Ireland (@KFC_UKI) February 9, 2019
But fear not, both eateries have said that, if demand for the pizza is high enough, then it could be coming to stores across the UK next year. But are you excited or terrified?
A KFC UK and Ireland spokesperson (apparently not The Colonel) said: “Dreams really do come true. Pairing our signature gravy and Popcorn Chicken with Pizza Hut’s famous base and toppings is a match made in heaven.
“Believe us when we say it’s a thing of absolute beauty.”
Speaking for the other side a Pizza Hut spokesperson added: “At Pizza Hut, we are all about bringing our consumers what they want – and what could be better than a Gravy Supreme. It combines the best of KFC and Pizza Hut to make the perfect pizza!” Credit: KFC & Pizza Hut
People on social media are, as you probably guessed, pretty gassed about the mash up, with many excited to try the pizza.
One user described the Gravy Supreme as “My idea of heaven.”
Another called it a””game changer”.
“THE DREAM” said a third.
But some fast-food fans weren’t as buzzed for the mash up.
One tweeted: “I’m all for trying new foods and a sucker for Limited Edition things but that KFC Pizza Hut mash up mess is something I do NOT need in my life.”
A second asked: “Gravy on pizza??? Are you mad?”
While a third tweeted: “Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.”
Watch this space for more information on this launch dropping in restaurants – but what do you think? Would you order it or would you prefer to keep your takeaways separate? Featured Image Credit: Gift Republic

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India Cheese Market is projected to reach a value of INR 125.4 Billion by 2024

You have Already saved this Press Release to your Library. India Cheese Market is projected to reach a value of INR 125.4 Billion by 2024 Nita Shetty 28th-Feb-2019 15
Market Reports on India Provides the Trending Market Research Report on “ Cheese Market in India: Industry Trends, Share, Size, Growth, Opportunity and Forecast 2019-2024 ” under Food & Beverage category. The report offers a collection of superior market research, market analysis, competitive intelligence and industry reports.
Cheese Market in India reached a value of INR XX Billion in 2018, registering a CAGR of around 25.5% during 2011-2018. The market is further projected to reach a value of INR 125.4 Billion by 2024, growing at a CAGR of XX% during 2019-2024. India is currently the world’s largest producer of milk owing to which the cheese market holds significant growth potential. With the rising influence of western cuisines and inflating disposable incomes, consumers are now shifting from paneer towards cheese, thereby increasing its demand in the country. In addition to this, manufacturers are introducing a number of flavored cheese products including pepper, garlic, red chili flakes, and oregano pickle, which cater to the different tastes and preferences of consumers in India.
Cheese Market in India: Drivers
Although cheese is extensively used in fast food items like pasta, pizzas, burgers, sandwiches, wraps, tacos, cakes, garlic bread, etc., it is also being included in traditional Indian recipes such as dosa, uttapam and parathas. With the growing working population and their altering food patterns, the fast food industry is experiencing a healthy growth which, in turn, is augmenting the demand for cheese. Apart from this, with an increase in the number of organized retail outlets, numerous global players are now investing in the Indian cheese market. Moreover, several manufacturers are engaging in marketing campaigns through different advertising media like newspapers, televisions and social media platforms to increase awareness among consumers about the benefits of cheese. These factors are anticipated to boost the consumption of cheese in the upcoming years.
Request a free sample copy of Cheese Market Report @ http://www.marketreportsonindia.com/marketreports/Sample/Reports/1379416
Market Summary:
Breakup by Type:
On the basis of types, the market has been divided into processed cheese, mozzarella, cheddar, Emmental, ricotta and others. At present, processed cheese represents the most popular product type in India.
Breakup by Format:
Based on formats, the market has been classified into slices, diced/cubes, shredded, blocks, liquid, crème and cheese spreads. Amongst these, cheese slices hold the dominant share as they are widely used in homes and restaurants for preparing sandwiches and burgers.
Breakup by Application:
On the basis of applications, the market has been segregated as pizzas, burgers, sandwiches, wraps, cakes, and others. Currently, pizza represents the leading application area of cheese, accounting for the majority of the market share.
Breakup by Retail/Institutional:
The cheese market in India has been bifurcated into retail and institutional channels, wherein retail sales exhibit a clear dominance in the market. Cheese is supplied to supermarkets/hypermarkets, department stores, malls and retail shops for further distribution to consumers.
Regional Insights:
On a geographical front, Maharashtra enjoys the leading position in the cheese market in India. Other regions include Karnataka, Tamil Nadu, Delhi, Gujarat, Andhra Pradesh and Telangana, Uttar Pradesh, West Bengal, Kerala, Haryana, Punjab, Rajasthan, Madhya Pradesh, Bihar and Orissa.
Competitive Landscape:
The cheese market in India is highly concentrated in nature with the presence of only a few large manufacturers, such as GCMMF, Parag Milk Foods, Britannia and Mother Dairy. These players compete against one another in terms of prices and quality.
Browse our full report with Table of Contents : http://www.marketreportsonindia.com/marketreports/cheese-market-in-india-industry-trends-share-size-growth-opportunity-and-forecast-2019-2024/1379416
About Market Reports on India:
Market Reports on India is an excellent source to obtain top quality market research reports that helps you to understand the business in the Indian market. We cover various industries, identifying and understanding key macro and micro-economic trends, insights and futuristic growth opportunities. To help achieve all this and more, Market Reports on India is the answer to all your business needs.
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Email : info@marketreportsonindia.com

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How an Entrepreneur Family in Utah Secured a Two-State Franchise Deal with a Fast-Growing, Breakout Indian Fast Casual Concept

How an Entrepreneur Family in Utah Secured a Two-State Franchise Deal with a Fast-Growing, Breakout Indian Fast Casual Concept
The Netto family reveals details about signing the largest multi-unit franchise agreement to-date for Curry Up Now with exclusive rights to the first locations in Utah and Colorado
A Salt Lake City-based entrepreneurial family is bringing Curry Up Now , the largest and fastest growing Indian fast casual concept in the United States, to Utah and Colorado. Last fall, John Netto and his family signed the largest multi-franchise agreement to-date for Curry Up Now, going beyond a five-unit agreement and negotiating exclusive rights to open the first 20 restaurants throughout Utah and Colorado.
The concept’s unique spin on traditional Indian cuisine, profitability outlook and successful franchise business model are among the factors that inspired Netto and his family to commit to becoming a Curry Up Now franchisee in the Rocky Mountain region. The following factors increased their confidence in becoming the dominant, and first, Indian fast casual in Utah and Colorado.
A unique spin on Indian cuisine
Solidifying its position as one of the nation’s most sought-after new concepts, Curry Up Now was recently featured in QSR’s 40 Under 40 , Nation’s Restaurant News’ 2018 Breakout Brands Report and named the top hot food-and-beverage chain by the International Council of Shopping Centers (ICSC).
“Our family loves Indian food, and Curry Up Now is unlike any other Indian concept out there,” said Netto. “You might not know saag paneer or chicken tikka masala, but when Curry Up Now puts it in their unique burrito, people try it, realize how much they like it, and keep coming back for more.”
Indian food is poised for rapid growth, with Innova Market Insights reporting that products made with ethnic flavors jumped 20 percent between 2013 and 2017. Influential groups like millennials are also more interested in innovative, healthy food and unique flavors than older generations. According to Technomic’s 2018 Generational Consumer Trend Report , 44 percent of millennials would like to see more ethnic options at restaurants.
A profitable venture Akash Kapoor, founder of Curry Up Now.
Akash Kapoor, the founder of Curry Up Now, spent years perfecting Curry Up Now’s food and flavors, which are shared with a professional commissary to produce the sauces, chutneys and other goods. Rather than requiring franchisees to purchase higher-priced food directly from the franchisor, Curry Up Now offers franchisees the ability to purchase the food directly from the commissary at the same price as the founders, giving franchisees even more opportunity to be profitable.
Taking advantage of the way Curry Up Now leverages conversions where possible to keep opening costs down, the Netto family says they can easily afford the best real estate in Utah and Colorado, further positioning them as the dominant, and first, Indian fast casual in the two states.
The right business model
Curry Up Now takes traditional Indian flavors and presents them in a friendly, recognizable format. Their menu fan-favorites include the iconic Tikka Masala Burrito, Deconstructed Samosa, Sexy Fries, and Naughty Naan; traditional items such as Kathi Rolls, Biryani, and Thali Platters; and Indian street food offerings like Pani Puri, Marwari Kachori Chaat, Bhel Puri, and Papdi Chaat.
“There are over one billion Indians in the world and not a single national Indian restaurant brand,” said Dan Rowe, CEO of Fransmart, Curry Up Now’s exclusive franchise development partner. “I looked for years for the right concept – authentic and craveable food, a concept with real soul and their own unique DNA, a broadly appealing concept for mainstream, and of course strong unit economics so franchisees can thrive. Curry Up Now has the best unit economics of any brand we have worked with, and this is just the beginning for them.”
Curry Up Now is partnered with Fransmart, the industry-leading franchise development company behind the explosive growth of brands like Five Guys Burgers and Fries, The Halal Guys, and Qdoba Mexican Grill, as their exclusive franchise development partner to grow the brand. The concept is currently looking for experienced multi-unit foodservice operators to develop franchise territories in top 40 major media markets across the U.S. To learn more about franchising opportunities with Curry Up Now, visit go.fransmart.com/curryupnow
To learn more and stay up-to-date on the latest happenings, find Curry Up Now on Facebook , Twitter and Instagram .
Curry Up Now was established in 2009 by Akash Kapoor and his wife Rana, and ably supported by co-founder and now Senior VP of Operations, Amir Hosseini. The concept, which is known for its innovative spin on traditional Indian cuisine, has been recognized in publications such as Zagat: ‘5 Hottest Fast-Casual Chains,’ EATER SF: ‘SF’s Best Indian Restaurants,’ 7×7: ‘100 Things To Eat Before You Die,’ QSR: ‘40 Under 40,’ Fast Casual: ‘Top 100’ movers & shakers, and Nation’s Restaurant News: ‘2018 Breakout Brand.’ Curry Up Now currently operates six brick-and-mortar locations in San Francisco, San Jose, San Mateo, Oakland, Palo Alto, and Alameda, as well as four food trucks rolling under the same name. For more information about Curry Up Now, visit www.curryupnow.com .
Fransmart is the global leader in franchise development, turning emerging restaurant concepts into national and global brands for over 10 years. Company founder Dan Rowe identified and grew brands like Five Guys Burgers & Fries and QDOBA Mexican Grill from 1-5 unit businesses to the powerhouse chains they are today. Fransmart’s current and past franchise development portfolio brands have opened more than 5,000 restaurants in 45 states and 35 countries. Fransmart and their partner brands are committed to franchise development growth. For more information, visit www.fransmart.com .

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James Beard Foundation Announces 2019 Restaurant and Chef Semifinalists

James Beard Foundation Announces 2019 Restaurant and Chef Semifinalists
New York, NY ( Restaurant News Release ) The James Beard Foundation announced today its list of Restaurant and Chef Award semifinalists in advance of the 29th annual James Beard Awards. The prestigious group of semifinalists across all categories represents a wide collection of culinary talent, from exceptional chefs and dining destinations nationally and across ten different regions to the best new restaurants, outstanding bar, outstanding baker , and a rising star chefs 30 years of age or under. The full list of 2019 semifinalists can be reviewed at the end of the press release or directly at the James Beard Foundation website .
The Foundation will announce the final nominees for all Award categories during a press conference in Houston, hosted by James Beard Award–winning chef Hugo Ortega at his namesake Mexican restaurant, Hugo’s, on Wednesday, March 27th, 2019. The event will take place at 9:00 A.M. CT / 10:00 A.M. ET and will be streamed live online (details coming soon on the Foundation’s website) and the nominees will be live-tweeted via the James Beard Foundation Twitter feed at twitter.com/beardfoundation .
Overview of Restaurant and Chef Awards Process
The James Beard Foundation holds an online open call for entries beginning in mid-October of each year. Entries received, along with input solicited from an independent volunteer group of more than 250 panelists around the country, are reviewed by the Restaurant and Chef Committee to determine eligibility and regional representation. Based on the results and eligibility requirements for each award, the committee then produces a nominating ballot that lists the semifinalists in each of the 21 Restaurant and Chef Award categories. The list of semifinalists is then voted on by more than 600 judges from across the country to determine the final nominees in each category. The same group of judges, which comprises leading regional restaurant critics, food and wine editors, culinary educators, and past James Beard Award winners, then votes on the nominees to select the winners. Tabulations to determine the nominees and winners are done by independent auditors Lutz & Carr. The governing Awards committee, board of trustees, and staff of the James Beard Foundation do not vote, and the results are kept confidential until the presentation of winners in May. James Beard Awards policies and procedures can be reviewed at jamesbeard.org/awards/policies .
2019 James Beard Awards Restaurant and Chef Award Semifinalists and Award Criteria
Best New Restaurant
A restaurant opened in 2018 that already demonstrates excellence in cuisine and hospitality, and that is likely to make a significant impact in years to come. Adda Indian Canteen, NYC Bardea Food & Drink, Wilmington, DE Bavel, Los Angeles Bywater American Bistro, New Orleans Canard, Portland, OR The Elysian Bar, New Orleans Folk, Nashville Larder Delicatessen and Bakery, Cleveland Lineage, Wailea, HI Petra and the Beast, Dallas Popol Vuh, Minneapolis The Surf Club Restaurant, Surfside, FL Vianda, San Juan, PR
Outstanding Baker
A pastry chef or baker who demonstrates exceptional skill, integrity, and character in the preparation of desserts, pastries, or breads served in a retail bakery. Must have been working as a pastry chef or baker for the past five years. Umber Ahmad, Mah-Ze-Dahr Bakery, NYC Kim Boyce, Bakeshop, Portland, OR Andy Clark, Moxie Bread Co., Louisville, CO Evrim Dogu and Evin Dogu, Sub Rosa Bakery, Richmond, VA Tova du Plessis, Essen Bakery, Philadelphia Zachary Golper, Bien Cuit, NYC Don Guerra, Barrio Bread, Tucson, AZ Naomi Harris, Madruga Bakery, Coral Gables, FL Stephanie Hart, Brown Sugar Bakery, Chicago Maura Kilpatrick, Sofra Bakery and Café, Cambridge, MA Lisa Ludwinski, Sister Pie, Detroit Greg Mindel, Neighbor Bakehouse, San Francisco Taylor Petrehn, 1900 Barker, Lawrence, KS Alison Pray, Standard Baking Co., Portland, ME Nathaniel Reid, Nathaniel Reid Bakery, Kirkwood, MO Avery Ruzicka, Manresa Bread, Los Gatos, CA Kit Schumann and Jesse Schumann, Sea Wolf Bakers, Seattle Debbie Swenerton, Black Bear Bread Co., Grayton Beach, FL Greg Wade, Publican Quality Bread, Chicago Chris Wilkins, Root Baking Co., Atlanta
Outstanding Bar Program
A restaurant or bar that demonstrates exceptional care and skill in the selection, preparation, and serving of cocktails, spirits, and/or beer. Anvil Bar & Refuge, Houston The Atomic Lounge, Birmingham, AL The Baldwin Bar, Woburn, MA Bar Agricole, San Francisco Bryant’s Cocktail Lounge, Milwaukee Clavel Mezcaleria, Baltimore La Factoría, San Juan, PR Leyenda, Brooklyn, NY The Monarch Bar, Kansas City, MO Monk’s Café, Philadelphia Old Lightning, Marina Del Rey, CA Planter’s House, St. Louis Saint Leo, Oxford, MS Ticonderoga Club, Atlanta
Outstanding Chef (Presented by All-Clad Metalcrafters)
A chef who sets high culinary standards and who has served as a positive example for other food professionals. Must have been working as a chef for the past five years. Ashley Christensen, Poole’s Diner, Raleigh, NC Renee Erickson, Bateau, Seattle Colby Garrelts, Bluestem, Kansas City, MO Sarah Grueneberg, Monteverde, Chicago Shiro Kashiba, Sushi Kashiba, Seattle David Kinch, Manresa, Los Gatos, CA Christopher Kostow, The Restaurant at Meadowood, St. Helena, CA Corey Lee, Benu, San Francisco Donald Link, Herbsaint, New Orleans Margot McCormack, Margot Café & Bar, Nashville Tory Miller, L’Etoile, Madison, WI Maricel Presilla, Cucharamama, Hoboken, NJ Missy Robbins, Lilia, Brooklyn, NY Chrysa Robertson, Rancho Pinot, Scottsdale, AZ Gabriel Rucker, Le Pigeon, Portland, OR Chris Shepherd, Georgia James, Houston Ana Sortun, Oleana, Cambridge, MA Vikram Sunderam, Rasika, Washington, C. Fabio Trabocchi, Fiola, Washington, C. Marc Vetri, Vetri Cucina, Philadelphia
Outstanding Pastry Chef (Presented by Lavazza)
A pastry chef or baker who demonstrates exceptional skill, integrity, and character in the preparation of desserts, pastries, or breads served in a restaurant. Must have been working as a pastry chef or baker for the past five years. Jeb Breakell, The Wolf’s Tailor, Denver Ashley Capps, Buxton Hall, Asheville, NC Juan Contreras, Atelier Crenn, San Francisco Kelly Fields, Willa Jean, New Orleans Meg Galus, Boka, Chicago Megan Garrelts, Rye, Leawood, KS Zoe Kanan, Simon & the Whale, NYC Michelle Karr-Ueoka, MW Restaurant, Honolulu Margarita Manzke, République, Los Angeles James Matty, Suraya, Philadelphia Junko Mine, Cafe Juanita, Kirkland, WA Diane Moua, Spoon and Stable, Minneapolis Pichet Ong, Brothers and Sisters, Washington, C. Natasha Pickowicz, Flora Bar, NYC Michelle Polzine, 20th Century Café, San Francisco Rabii Saber, Four Seasons Resort, Orlando, FL Ricardo “Ricchi” Sanchez, Bullion, Dallas Laura Sawicki, Launderette, Austin Whang Suh, Hen & Heifer, Guilford, CT Cynthia Wong, Life Raft Treats, Charleston, SC
Outstanding Restaurant (Presented by S.Pellegrino® Sparkling Natural Mineral Water)
A restaurant that demonstrates consistent excellence in food, atmosphere, service, and operations. Must have been in business 10 or more consecutive years. Balthazar, NYC El Charro Café, Tucson, AZ FIG, Charleston, SC The Original Ninfa’s on Navigation, Houston Park’s BBQ, Los Angeles Quince, San Francisco Zahav, Philadelphia
Outstanding Restaurateur (Presented by Magellan Corporation)
A restaurateur who demonstrates creativity in entrepreneurship and integrity in restaurant operations. Must have been in the restaurant business for at least 10 years. Must not have been nominated for a James Beard Foundation chef award in the past five years. Hugh Acheson, Atlanta (Empire State South, Five & Ten, The National, and others) Paul Bartolotta and Joe Bartolotta, The Bartolotta Restaurants, Milwaukee (Ristorante Bartolotta, Harbor House, Lake Park Bistro, and others) JoAnn Clevenger, Upperline, New Orleans Richard DeShantz and Tolga Sevdik, Richard DeShantz Restaurant Group, Pittsburgh (Poulet Bleu, Fish nor Fowl, Butcher and the Rye, and others) Benjamin Goldberg and Max Goldberg, Strategic Hospitality, Nashville (The Catbird Seat, The Patterson House, Henrietta Red, and others) Ruth Gresser, Pizzeria Paradiso, Washington, D.C. (Pizzeria Paradiso, Birreria Paradiso) Martha Hoover, Patachou Inc., Indianapolis (Café Patachou, Petite Chou, Public Greens, and others) Rob Katz and Kevin Boehm, Boka Restaurant Group, Chicago (Boka, Girl & the Goat, Momotaro, and others) Ed Kenney, Honolulu (Town, Mud Hen Water, Mahina & Sun’s, and others) Brenda Langton and Timothy Kane, Spoonriver, Minneapolis Anthony Myint and Karen Leibowitz, San Francisco (Mission Chinese Food, The Perennial, Commonwealth) Akkapong (Earl) Ninsom, Portland, OR (Langbaan, Hat Yai, PaaDee, and others) Ken Oringer, Boston (Little Donkey, Toro, Uni, and others) Steve Palmer, The Indigo Road, Charleston, SC (The Macintosh, Oak Steakhouse, Indaco, and others) Julie Petrakis and James Petrakis, Swine Family Restaurant Group, Orlando, FL (The Ravenous Pig, Cask & Larder, The Polite Pig, and others) Alex Raij and Eder Montero, NYC (La Vara, Txikito, Saint Julivert Fisherie, and others) Ethan Stowell, Ethan Stowell Restaurants, Seattle (Ballard Pizza Co., Bramling Cross, Cortina, and others) Tracy Vaught, H Town Restaurant Group, Houston (Hugo’s, Caracol, Xochi, and others) Jason Wang, Xi’an Famous Foods, NYC Ellen Yin, High Street Hospitality Group, Philadelphia (Fork, High Street on Market, High Street on Hudson)
Outstanding Service
A restaurant in operation for five or more years that demonstrates consistency and exceptional thoughtfulness in hospitality and service. Back Bay Grill, Portland, ME Birrieria Zaragoza, Chicago Chef Vola’s, Atlantic City, NJ Frasca Food and Wine, Boulder, CO The French Room, Dallas Mama J’s, Richmond, VA Marcel’s by Robert Wiedmaier, Washington, C. n/naka, Los Angeles Peking Gourmet Inn, Falls Church, VA Saison, San Francisco Swan Oyster Depot, San Francisco Tony’s, Houston Victoria & Albert’s, Orlando, FL Zingerman’s Roadhouse, Ann Arbor, MI
Outstanding Wine Program (Presented by Robert Mondavi Winery)
A restaurant or bar that demonstrates excellence in wine service through a carefully considered wine list and a well-informed approach to helping customers choose and drink wine. Bacchanal, New Orleans element 47 at the Little Nell, Aspen, CO Great China, Berkeley, CA Lucky Palace, Bossier City, LA Miller Union, Atlanta Pappas Bros. Steakhouse at the Galleria, Houston Spiaggia, Chicago Stems & Skins, North Charleston, SC Tail Up Goat, Washington, C.
Outstanding Wine, Spirits, or Beer Producer
A beer, wine, or spirits producer who demonstrates consistency and exceptional skill in his or her craft. An Bui, Mekong and The Answer Brewpub, Richmond, VA Cathy Corison, Corison Winery, St. Helena, CA Rutger de Vink, RdV Vineyards, Delaplane, VA Dave Green, Skagit Valley Malting, Burlington, WA Deirdre Heekin, La Garagista, Bethel, VT Nancy Irelan, Red Tail Ridge Winery, Penn Yan, NY Drew Kulsveen, Willett Distillery, Bardstown, KY Todd Leopold and Scott Leopold, Leopold Bros., Denver Sean Lilly Wilson, Fullsteam Brewery, Durham, NC Ann Marshall and Scott Blackwell, High Wire Distilling Co., Charleston, SC Steve Matthiasson, Matthiasson Wines, Napa, CA Kim McPherson, McPherson Cellars, Lubbock, TX Meredith Meyer Grelli, Wigle Whiskey, Pittsburgh Yoshihiro Sako, Den Sake Brewery, Oakland, CA Jordan Salcito, Ramona, NYC Mike Sauer, Red Willow Vineyard, Wapato, WA Jeffrey Stuffings, Jester King Brewery, Austin Rob Tod, Allagash Brewing Company, Portland, ME Mhairi Voelsgen, broVo Spirits, Woodinville, WA Lance Winters, St. George Spirits, Alameda, CA
Rising Star Chef of the Year (Presented by S.Pellegrino® Sparkling Natural Mineral Water)
A chef age 30 or younger who displays exceptional talent, character, and leadership ability, and who is likely to make a significant impact in years to come. Rachel Bennett, The Library, St. Petersburg, FL Jay Blackinton, Aelder/Hogstone’s Wood Oven, Orcas Island, WA Nick Bognar, Nippon Tei, St. Louis Ana Castro, Coquette, New Orleans Valerie Chang and Nando Chang, Itamae, Miami Calvin Davis, Freshwater, Kansas City, MO Alisha Elenz, MFK, Chicago Evan Gaudreau, Renzo, Charleston, SC Rikki Giambruno, Hyacinth, St. Paul, MN Becca Hegarty, Bitter Ends Luncheonette, Pittsburgh Alexander Hong, Sorrel, San Francisco Jesse Ito, Royal Izakaya, Philadelphia Irene Li, Mei Mei, Boston Giselle Miller, Menton, Boston Kwame Onwuachi, Kith and Kin, Washington, C. Ian Redshaw, Lampo Neapolitan Pizzeria, Charlottesville, VA Jonathan “Jonny” Rhodes, Restaurant Indigo, Houston Samantha Sanz, Talavera at the Four Seasons, Scottsdale, AZ Lena Sareini, Selden Standard, Detroit Cassie Shortino, Tratto, Phoenix Jonathan Yao, Kato, Los Angeles
Best Chefs
Chefs who set high culinary standards and also demonstrate integrity and admirable leadership skills in their respective regions. A nominee may be from any kind of dining establishment but must have been working as a chef for at least five years, with the three most recent years spent in the region.
Best Chef: Great Lakes (IL, IN, MI, OH) Thai Dang and Danielle Dang, HaiSous Vietnamese Kitchen, Chicago Diana Dávila, Mi Tocaya Antojería, Chicago Paul Fehribach, Big Jones, Chicago Norberto Garita, El Barzon, Detroit Jason Hammel, Lula Café, Chicago Brian Jupiter, Frontier, Chicago Beverly Kim and Johnny Clark, Parachute, Chicago Anthony Lombardo, SheWolf, Detroit Ethan Pikas, Cellar Door Provisions, Chicago David Posey and Anna Posey, Elske, Chicago Iliana Regan, Kitsune, Chicago James Rigato, Mabel Gray, Hazel Park, MI Jose Salazar, Mita’s, Cincinnati Noah Sandoval, Oriole, Chicago Steven Oakley, Oakleys Bistro, Indianapolis Genevieve Vang, Bangkok 96, Dearborn, MI Jill Vedaa, Salt, Lakewood, OH Kate Williams, Lady of the House, Detroit Lee Wolen, Boka, Chicago
Best Chef: Mid-Atlantic (D.C., DE, MD, NJ, PA, VA) Joey Baldino, Zeppoli, Collingswood, NJ Sandeep “Sunny” Baweja, Lehja, Richmond, VA Jamilka Borges, The Independent Brewing Company, Pittsburgh Amy Brandwein, Centrolina, Washington, C. Erik Bruner-Yang, Brothers and Sisters, Washington, C. Kristin Butterworth, Lautrec, Farmington, PA Tom Cunanan, Bad Saint, Washington, C. Nicholas Elmi, Laurel, Philadelphia Randy Forrester, Osteria Radici, Allentown, NJ Jerome Grant, Sweet Home Café, Washington, C. Haidar Karoum, Chloë, Washington, C. Matthew Kern, Heirloom, Lewes, DE Rich Landau, Vedge, Philadelphia Cristina Martinez, South Philly Barbacoa, Philadelphia Dan Richer, Razza Pizza Artigianale, Jersey City, NJ Jon Sybert, Tail Up Goat, Washington, C. Kevin Tien, Himitsu, Washington, C. Cindy Wolf, Charleston, Baltimore Nobu Yamazaki, Sushi Taro, Washington, C. Wei Zhu, Chengdu Gourmet, Pittsburgh
Best Chef: Midwest (IA, KS, MN, MO, NE, ND, SD, WI) Dane Baldwin, The Diplomat, Milwaukee Karen Bell, Bavette La Boucherie, Milwaukee Thomas Boemer, In Bloom, St. Paul, MN Steven Brown, Tilia, Minneapolis Michael Corvino, Corvino Supper Club & Tasting Room, Kansas City, MO Daniel del Prado, Martina, Minneapolis Linda Duerr, The Restaurant at 1900, Mission Woods, KS Michael Gallina, Vicia, St. Louis Nicholas Goellner, The Antler Room, Kansas City, MO Jonny Hunter, Forequarter, Madison, WI Dan Jacobs and Dan Van Rite, EsterEv, Milwaukee Ann Kim, Young Joni, Minneapolis Lona Luo, Lona’s Lil Eats, St. Louis Jamie Malone, Grand Café, Minneapolis Jesse Mendica, Olive + Oak, Webster Groves, MO Tim Nicholson, The Boiler Room, Omaha, NE Christina Nguyen, Hai Hai, Minneapolis Karyn Tomlinson, Corner Table, Minneapolis Joe Tripp, Harbinger, Des Moines, IA Ny Vongsaly, Billie-Jean, Clayton, MO
Best Chef: New York City (Five Boroughs) Cosme Aguilar, Casa Enrique Rawia Bishara, Tanoreen, Brooklyn, NY Amanda Cohen, Dirt Candy Billy Durney, Hometown Bar-B-Que, Brooklyn, NY Sean Gray, Momofuku Ko Joseph “JJ” Johnson, Henry at Life Hotel Sohui Kim, Insa, Brooklyn, NY Josh Ku and Trigg Brown, Win Son, Brooklyn, NY Angie Mar, Beatrice Inn Erik Ramirez, Llama Inn, Brooklyn, NY Ann Redding and Matt Danzer, Uncle Boons Daniela Soto-Innes, Atla Jeremiah Stone and Fabián von Hauske, Wildair Alex Stupak, Empellón Midtown Scott Tacinelli and Angie Rito, Don Angie Jody Williams and Rita Sodi, Via Carota Helen You, Dumpling Galaxy, Queens, NY
Best Chef: Northeast (CT, MA, ME, NH, NY State, RI, VT) Unmi Abkin, Coco & The Cellar Bar, Easthampton, MA Tyler Anderson, Millwright’s, Simsbury, CT Hannah Black and Carla Perez-Gallardo, Lil’ Deb’s Oasis, Hudson, NY Cara Chigazola-Tobin, Honey Road, Burlington, VT Chad Conley and Greg Mitchell, Palace Diner, Biddeford, ME Krista Kern Desjarlais, The Purple House, North Yarmouth, ME Vien Dobui, Cong Tu Bot, Portland, ME Carl Dooley, The Table at Season to Taste, Cambridge, MA Tiffani Faison, Tiger Mama, Boston Erin French, The Lost Kitchen, Freedom, ME Victor Parra Gonzalez, Las Puertas, Buffalo, NY Seizi Imura, Cafe Sushi, Cambridge, MA Evan Mallett, Black Trumpet, Portsmouth, NH James Mark, North, Providence Cassie Piuma, Sarma, Somerville, MA Keiko Suzuki Steinberger, Suzuki’s Sushi Bar, Rockland, ME Benjamin Sukle, Oberlin, Providence, RI Peter Ungár, Tasting Counter, Somerville, MA David Vargas, Vida Cantina, Portsmouth, NH
Best Chef: Northwest (AK, ID, MT, OR, WA, WY) Jose Chesa, Ataula, Portland, OR Peter Cho, Han Oak, Portland, OR Laura Cole, 229 Parks Restaurant & Tavern, Denali National Park & Preserve, AK Logan Cox, Homer, Seattle Alejandro Cruz, Novo Modern Latin Table, Eugene, OR Eric Donnelly, RockCreek, Seattle Gregory Gourdet, Departure, Portland, OR Eric Johnson, Stateside, Seattle Taichi Kitamura, Sushi Kappo Tamura, Seattle Ha (Christina) Luu and Peter Vuong, Ha VL, Portland, OR Katy Millard, Coquine, Portland, OR Kristen Murray, Måurice, Portland, OR Colin Patterson, Mana Restaurant, Leavenworth, WA Ryan Roadhouse, Nodoguro, Portland, OR Beau Schooler, In Bocca Al Lupo, Juneau, AK Mutsuko Soma, Kamonegi, Seattle Dave Wells, The Dining Room at Chico Hot Springs, Pray, MT Brady Williams, Canlis, Seattle Justin Woodward, Castagna, Portland, OR Rachel Yang and Seif Chirchi, Joule, Seattle
Best Chef: South (AL, AR, Commonwealth of Puerto Rico, FL, LA, MS) Lindsay Autry, The Regional Kitchen & Public House, West Palm Beach, FL David Bancroft, Acre, Auburn, AL Vishwesh Bhatt, Snackbar, Oxford, MS Bill Briand, Fisher’s Upstairs at Orange Beach Marina, Orange Beach, AL Clay Conley, Buccan, Palm Beach, FL Alex Eaton, The Manship Wood Fired Kitchen, Jackson, MS Jose Enrique, Jose Enrique, San Juan, PR Kristen Essig and Michael Stoltzfus, Coquette, New Orleans Maria Mercedes Grubb, Gallo Negro, San Juan, PR Michael Gulotta, Maypop, New Orleans Mason Hereford, Turkey and the Wolf, New Orleans Timothy Hontzas, Johnny’s Restaurant, Homewood, AL Brad Kilgore, Alter, Miami Niven Patel, Ghee Indian Kitchen, Miami Matthew McClure, The Hive, Bentonville, AR Alex Perry, Vestige, Ocean Springs, MS Jeannie Pierola, Edison: Food+Drink Lab, Tampa, FL Slade Rushing, Brennan’s, New Orleans Melissa Donahue-Talmage, Sweet Melissa’s Café, Sanibel, FL Isaac Toups, Toups’ Meatery, New Orleans
Best Chef: Southeast (GA, KY, NC, SC, TN, WV) Mashama Bailey, The Grey, Savannah, GA Rebecca Barron, St. John’s Restaurant, Chattanooga, TN Jon Buck, Husk Greenville, Greenville, SC Katie Button, Cúrate, Asheville, NC Gregory Collier, Loft & Cellar, Charlotte, NC Cassidee Dabney, The Barn at Blackberry Farm, Walland, TN Steven Devereaux Greene, Herons, Cary, NC Oscar Diaz, The Cortez, Raleigh, NC Bryan Furman, B’s Cracklin’ BBQ, Atlanta Josh Habiger, Bastion, Nashville Meherwan Irani, Chai Pani, Asheville, NC Kevin Johnson, The Grocery, Charleston, SC Joe Kindred, Kindred, Davidson, NC Cheetie Kumar, Garland, Raleigh, NC Jacques Larson, The Obstinate Daughter, Sullivan’s Island, SC Dean Neff, PinPoint, Wilmington, NC Ryan Smith, Staplehouse, Atlanta Brian So, Spring, Marietta, GA Julia Sullivan, Henrietta Red, Nashville Andrew Ticer and Michael Hudman, Andrew Michael Italian Kitchen, Memphis
Best Chef: Southwest (AZ, CO, NM, OK, TX, UT) Charleen Badman, FnB, Scottsdale, AZ Kevin Binkley, Binkley’s Restaurant, Phoenix Jen Castle and Blake Spalding, Hell’s Backbone Grill, Boulder, UT Bruno Davaillon, Bullion, Dallas Iliana de la Vega, El Naranjo, Austin Kevin Fink, Emmer & Rye, Austin Michael Fojtasek, Olamaie, Austin Bryce Gilmore, Barley Swine, Austin Caroline Glover, Annette, Aurora, CO Nadia Holguin, Roland’s Cafe Market Bar, Phoenix Ronnie Killen, Killen’s Steakhouse, Pearland, TX Kaiser Lashkari, Himalaya, Houston Steve McHugh, Cured, San Antonio Trong Nguyen, Crawfish & Noodles, Houston Jonathan Perno, Campo at Los Poblanos, Albuquerque, NM Maribel Rivero, Yuyo, Austin Regino Rojas, Purépecha Room by Revolver Taco Lounge, Dallas Silvana Salcido Esparza, Barrio Café Gran Reserva, Phoenix David Uygur, Lucia, Dallas Kelly Whitaker, The Wolf’s Tailor, Denver
Best Chef: West (CA, HI, NV) Genet Agonafer, Meals by Genet, Los Angeles Reem Assil, Reem’s California, Oakland, CA Gabriela Cámara, Cala, San Francisco Michael Cimarusti, Providence, Los Angeles Jeremy Fox, Rustic Canyon, Santa Monica, CA Chris Kajioka and Anthony Rush, Senia, Honolulu Matthew Kammerer, Harbor House Inn, Elk, CA Jessica Koslow, Sqirl, Los Angeles Brandon Rodgers and Ian Scaramuzza, In Situ, San Francisco Travis Lett, Gjelina, Venice, CA Niki Nakayama, n/naka, Los Angeles Dominica Rice-Cisneros, Cosecha Café, Oakland, CA Carlos Salgado, Taco María, Costa Mesa, CA Joshua Skenes, Saison, San Francisco Sheridan Su, Flock and Fowl, Las Vegas James Syhabout, Commis, Oakland, CA Karen Taylor, El Molino Central, Sonoma, CA Pim Techamuanvivit, Kin Khao, San Francisco Kris Yenbamroong, Night + Market, Los Angeles Claudette Zepeda-Wilkins, El Jardín, San Diego
About the 2019 James Beard Awards
The 2019 James Beard Awards celebrations begin in New York City on Friday, April 26, 2019, with the James Beard Media Awards, an exclusive event honoring the nation’s top cookbook authors, culinary broadcast producers and hosts, and food journalists that will take place at Pier Sixty at Chelsea Piers.
The events then move to Chicago, beginning with the Leadership Awards dinner on Sunday, May 5, 2019, at which honorees will be recognized for their work in creating a more healthful, sustainable, and just food world. The James Beard Awards Gala will take place on Monday, May 6, 2019, at the Lyric Opera of Chicago. During the event, which is open to the public, awards for the Restaurant and Chef and Restaurant Design categories will be handed out, along with special achievement awards Humanitarian of the Year, Lifetime Achievement, Design Icon, and America’s Classics. A gala reception will immediately follow, featuring chefs and beverage professionals from across the country, all of whom are involved in the Foundation’s Impact Programs.
The 2019 James Beard Awards are proudly hosted by Choose Chicago and the Illinois Restaurant Association and presented in association with Chicago O’Hare and Midway International Airports and Magellan Corporation as well as the following partners: Premier Sponsors: All-Clad Metalcrafters, American Airlines, HMSHost, Lavazza, S.Pellegrino® Sparkling Natural Mineral Water ; Supporting Sponsors: Hyatt, National Restaurant Association™, Robert Mondavi Winery, Skuna Bay Salmon, TABASCO® Sauce, Valrhona, White Claw® Hard Seltzer, Windstar Cruises; Gala Reception Sponsors: Dogfish Head Craft Brewery, Ecolab, Front of the House®, Kendall College, Segura Viudas USA with additional support from Chefwear, Loacker and VerTerra Dinnerware.
Established in 1990, the James Beard Awards recognize culinary professionals for excellence and achievement in their fields and further the Foundation’s mission to celebrate, nurture, and honor chefs and other leaders making America’s food culture more delicious, diverse, and sustainable for everyone. Each award category has an individual committee made up of industry professionals who volunteer their time to oversee the policies, procedures, and selection of judges for their respective Awards programs. All James Beard Award winners receive a certificate and a medallion engraved with the James Beard Foundation Awards insignia.
About the James Beard Foundation
The James Beard Foundation’s mission is to promote good food for good ™. For more than 30 years, the James Beard Foundation has highlighted the centrality of food culture in our daily lives. Through the James Beard Awards, unique dining experiences at the James Beard House and around the country, scholarships, hands-on learning, and a variety of industry programs that educate and empower leaders in our community, the Foundation has built a platform for chefs and asserted the power of gastronomy to drive behavior, culture, and policy change around food. To that end, the Foundation has also created signature impact-oriented initiatives that include our Women’s Leadership Programs, aimed at addressing the gender imbalance in the culinary industry; advocacy training through our Chefs Boot Camp for Policy and Change; and the James Beard Foundation Leadership Awards, which shine a spotlight on successful change makers. The organization is committed to giving chefs and their colleagues a voice and the tools they need to make the world more sustainable, equitable, and delicious for everyone. For more information, please visit jamesbeard.org and follow @beardfoundation on Instagram , Twitter , and Facebook .
Media Contacts: Mary Blanton Ogushwitz / Jane Shapiro Magrino

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DDWL (Drawerian Dildo Wrestling League)
Dildrone (Aerial Cumshots Have Never Hurt So Good)
The Dildroid (The Boldest Step in Fake Phallus History) (Made and Programmed With Loving Care For Those Who Crave The Silent Obedience of a Dildo, In A Familiar Human Shape)
Herm Radio (Don’t Bother Changing The Channel, He’s On All Of Them)
Peter Steele’s Gonna Fuck Your Girlfriend (I’m Not Even Mad, That Thing’s Just Impressive)
David Lee Roth’s Gonna Fuck Your Girlfriend (Yeah, I Kinda Figured He Would)
GG Allin’s Gonna Fuck Your Girlfriend (I Didn’t Think It Was Gonna Be Consensual, But Apparently She’s Into Some Weird Shit)
Eddie Vedder’s Gonna Fuck Your Girlfriend (He’ll Be Pearl Jammin’ It In Her Ass All Night Long)
Maynard James Keenan’s Gonna Fuck Your Girlfriend (The Real Origin Of The Song “Stinkfist”)
The Analcockpocalypse (In Which The Cum Chortler and The Cock Lopper Fight To The Death Over Their Lust For Cockthulu)
Herm The Third (The Child of Herm Jr.) (When He Was In The Womb His Schlong Was So Long It Flopped Out Of Herm Jr.’s Pussy And Fertilized His Dirt Farm All Day Long)
Herm’s Vaginal Vacuum (The Lack of Fresh Air Keeps All The Corpses Inside Ripe) (It’s Also The New Title Herm Has Given To Your Mouth, Get to Work)
Getting Prostate Punched to Death By Peewee Herman (All While In Character) (You’re Welcome For That Mental Image)
Seminal Extraction Surgery (Turns Out A Turkey Baster Can Replace A Catheter In A Pinch)
The Hermonculus (Fertilized In Herm’s Blackest Seed, Incubated In A Special Room Made Entirely Out Of Metallica)
Tearing Your Cock Off With Your Bare Hands And Putting It In Your Mouth To Prevent Biting Your Tongue Off When You Jam A Live Wire Into The Space Where It Used To Be
Carving Your Testicles Like Pumpkins (And The Face On Them Strongly Resembles Herm)
Performing Circumcision With A Pizza Slicer (Oh Shit, That’s Not Leftover Tomato Sauce)
Drawerian Pizzeria (Dough Made With Yeast From Herm’s Cunt, Sauce Made From His Menstrual Blood, and Cheese Made From His Smegma) (And You Don’t Wanna Know What the Sausage Is)
Herm-rambe (The World’s First Trans-Species Drawerian Gorilla Hybrid) (Dicks Out Or He’ll Take Your Ass)
Getting Raped By A Cock So Large It Pushes The Interior Of Your Dick Out Through Your Urethra (The World’s First (And Only) Simulation of a Male Period)
The Fapwater Park District Storage Facility (Upon Entering The Drawer The Newly Christened Drawerians Are Drained. These Stagnant Spooge Pools Are Stored For Herm’s Bathing Pleasure)
Urethral Infusion Station (This Is Where Drawerians Are Given A Small Injection of Herm’s “Essence”, Making Them (Unfortunately) Immortal)
Lucifina Audio Torture (The Most Effective And Controversial Interrogation Method Used At Guantanamo) (To Date, No Terrorist Has Been Able To Withstand Past the Second Track)
Attempting To Copulate With A Japanese Giant Hornet Nest (You Were So Preoccupied With Whether Or Not You Could, You Didn’t Stop To Think If You Should)
Jakwandique’s Dentistry And Penis Enlargement (They Both Involve Tying Part Of Your Body to a Doorknob and Slamming It)
Eating A Full Box of Nails And An Industrial Laxative To Scratch an Internal Rectal Itch (It Worked, But The Guys At The Hospital Won’t Stop Laughing At Me)
Splitting Your Cock Open Four Ways And Stratching It So It Looks Like The Face of The Monster From the Amnesia Games (If You Like Looking At Fucked Up Cock Holes, Here’s One For Ya)
Double Penetrated By A Monkey (If I Had A Prehensile Tail I’d Squeeze My Prostate All Day Long)
Painting A Portal Out Of The Drawer Onto And Around Herm’s Ass (Just To Watch The Poor Drawerian’s Face As He Leaps Inside)
Drawerian Sex Change Surgery (Your Eyelids Are Removed And You’re Placed In A Room Covered In Photos Of Herm Until You Get An Anti-Boner So Powerful That Your Dick Can Never Unrecede From Your Body)
The Shitcore Party (Running in the 2020 Election, With Their Primary Campaign Platform Being Liberation of The Drawer, Sadly, Like Most Politicans, They Won By An Overwhelming Majority But Completely Failed To Keep Their Promises) (The Fact That Their Candidate Was Pulled Into The Drawer During His Inauguration May Have Had Something To Do With It)
Experimental Cock Lengthening Procedure (It’s Just Tying Your Dick To A Jet) (Twenty Years Later, The Only Recipient Of This Treatment Is Still Screaming)
Getting Slammed Through A Table That’s Shoved Inside Your Ass (D-Von! Get The Lube!)
Being Forced to Eat Herm’s Used Urinal Cake (A Punishment Against Any Drawerian Who Speaks Heresy Against Herm’s Gender Or Metallica’s Greatness) (Do It Again And You Become The Urinal Cake)
Flattening Your Dick With A Truck So The Sides Become Razor Sharp And You Can Give The Pussy A Glasgow Smile
Drawerian Necktie (A Method Of Torture Where The Bladder Is Sliced Horizontally And The Penis Is Pulled Through)
Advertising Illegal Pornography By Buying A Little League Team (The “Lickable Little Lolis” Won Every Game That Year, More Than Likely Because They Were Threatened With An Appearance On The Site If They Lost)
Necrophiliatio (I Hope He Got Rigor Mortis, Otherwise You’ll Be Slurping On A Cold Wet Noodle)
Spreading Open Some Centenarian Pussy (Looks, Feels, and Smells Like Opening Up A Moldy Grilled Cheese)
The Splatter Shooter (A Drawer Incorporated Dildo That Fires Out The Strongest and Stickiest Jizz Ever Seen) (How Did You Think Spider-Man Got His Webs?)
Jamming A Length Of 1/2″ PVC Pipe Up Someone’s Ass, Threading Barbed Wire Through It, Then Removing The Pipe (Call That One A Drawerian Tail)
Experimental Pornography (Some People Think Sex Is Just Dick, Pussy, and Ass. We’re Here To Show You It’s Not.)
Having Your Cock Tied to a Machine That Injects You With Extra Chromosomes When You Get An Erection (I Get Up, I Get Downs)
Raping Someone With An Icicle (When It Melts From The Rectal Heat, All The Evidence Is Gone)
Pressure Washer Piss Spray (Getting Hosed Harder Than A Black Man In The Jim Crow South)
(Ain’t Nothin’ Worse Than) Hindus and Dindus (One’s Stealin Your Sheets, One’s Shittin’ In Your Streets)
Ringing Satan’s Doorbell (Once Slang For Female Masturbation, It Now Means Attempting To Ding Dong Ditch Herm’s House)
Meateor (The Result of a Drawer Incorporated “Missile” Launch Gone Horribly Wrong) (Apollo 13 Inches)
Ode To Centenarian Pussy (As The Sun Goes Down On Her Life, So Too Do I Go Down On Her)
The Ballad Of The World’s Oldest Nazi (The Centan-Aryan)
The Creature From Herm’s “Black Lagoon” (When You Slurp The Manko, But The Manko Slurps Back)
Drawer Incorporated Test of Anal Strength Contest (The “Man” With The Tightest Anal Clench Gets To Test Himself Against A Special Opponent) (Spoiler Alert: It’s Herm)
Punching Someone In The Dead Center Of Their Asshole With A Train (He Was From Then On Called “The King of Iron Fisting”)
Getting Your Testicles Annihilated By A Meat Tenderizer (So They Can Be The Meatballs on Herm’s Spaghetti)
The Cum-Ball Conundrum (You Have To Keep Chewing It So It Won’t Glue Your Mouth Shut, But The More You Chew, The More Aroused Herm Gets)
The Fatal Fetish (A Subject With a Very Particular Kink Is Locked In An Empty Room With A Laptop, And All Traces Of Their Kink Are Removed From The Internet Save A Single Video Starring Herm. The Question Is: How Long Before The Subject Breaks?)
The Never-Ending Rectal Roller Coaster (Having Your Intestines Pulled Out Through Your Ass And Forced Down Your Throat, In Turn Making It So That You Are Infinitely Fucking Yourself As Your Shit Out Your Guts) (Some Drawerians Have WILLINGLY Had This Done To Them By Another To Try And Avoid Being Raped Anymore By Herm) (Needless To Say, It Didn’t Work)
Dildonius Action Figure (Second in the Series of Official Drawer Incorporated Non-Sex Toys) (Now With True To Life Anal Gape Action)
Sticking Your Cock In A Fleshlight Full of Broken Glass While Mike Tyson Uses Your Ballsack As A Punching Bag
Intestinal Spaghetti (There’s A Very Good Reason Why Walt Disney Said We Couldn’t Animate Lady and the Tramp)
Getting Pregnant And Then Going To A Metal Gig To Save On Abortion Costs
Drawerian Tentacle Porn (When Japanese Hentai Becomes A Documentary, You Know You’re Fucked) (Literally)
Taking Your Fingers Out Of Herm’s Ass Then Putting Them Back In (Have You Tried Turning Him Off And On Again?)
Drawerian Geyser (The Term For When Herm Dumps Thirty-Five to One Hundred and Six Loads Deep Inside Your Anus, Forces You To Do A Handstand, Then Kicks You In Your Newly Distended Stomach, Causing The Splooge To Rocket Out Your Ass At Tremendous Speed) (So THAT’S How The Fuck It Got On The Ceiling)
Scratching Your Testicles With A Circular Saw (Now They’ll Never Itch Again)
The New Orleans Puke River Catastrophe (The Greatest Trick The Devil Ever Pulled Was Getting Someone Drunk Enough To Think That Throwing Mardi Gras Beads At Herm Would Be Humourous)
I’m Gonna Eat Your Ass Albert Fish Style (Cannibalize It Then Send A Letter To Your Family About How It Tastes)
My Downward Spiral Into Degeneracy Started Long Before Sexy Horses
Hoglan Style Nut Destroyer
Super Saiyan Donald Duck Bores A Hole Through Piccolo’s Stomach With His Six Foot Long Boner
Cooter Cocktails and Menstrual Meatballs
May’s Meat Monster (Made From Herm’s Vaginal Drippings) (It Has As Strong Of A Need To Die As It Does To Rape)
Drinking Herm Cum Straight From The Tap (With A Swirly Straw)
Manass: The Taste Of Taint
Trapped Halfway Between Earth And The Drawer (Your Lower Body Is Herm’s Plaything And All Your Upper Body Can Do Is Scream)
If You Show Up To A Million Man Circle Jerk You Don’t Deserve To Live
Flying Into Dick Mountain Ass-First
Cock-off-ony (The Sound Of A Billion Dicks Being Chopped Off Rings Through The Drawer)
The Life And Times Of Doug Dimmadrawer, Owner Of The Dimmsdale Dimmadrawer (Accepting A Franchise Offer From Herm Was The Last And Greatest Mistake He Ever Made)
Vaginal Prolapse (Taking The Definition Of A “Wizard Sleeve” To New Lengths)
Bathing In The Scat You Were Birthed From (The Origin Story Of Coonru And At Least Five Dildonii)
Guuci Gangbang (Eiffel Towered By Jake Paul And Ricegum) (God that’s fucking cancer / Like, pickle rick tier cancer – 3(|<5 P4//|< upon hearing that title)
Drawerian Carpet Ride (Unlike A Magic Carpet Ride, The Only Real Sight To See Is Your Face Being Dragged Across Herm's Bush)
The Eruption of Mount Saint May (The Result Of Two Weeks Of Taco Bell (By Herm Standards) Being Consumed In 2 Hours)
Prolapse Colored Glasses
Mayser (May And Yoko Sucking Every Rectum)
Live-Action Scatological Erotic Roleplay
Ball Blaster (Cumming So Hard That One Of Your Testicles Flies Out Like A Kidney Stone)
I'm About Three Seconds Away From Tearing Your Nose Hair Out Through Your Dong Tunnel
Bareback Steakhouse (Where The Meat Is Served The Same Way Every Time: Raw And Inside Of You)
Lynched And Dangled Above A Drawer Portal (So Herm Can Bat Your Dick Around While You Gasp For Air)
Masticating A Meaty Malk Fart From May's Mangled And Malignant Mudhole
Blasting Rope (Once Slang For Male Ejaculation, It Now Refers To A Man Being Shot And Lynched At The Same Time)
Pissing On A Cursed Tombstone (Then Raping The Ghost That Haunts You)
Watching Herm Jack Himself Off With A Cheese Grater (And Being Forced To Catch All The Scrotal Flakes On Your Tongue Before Swallowing Them)
Taco Bell Wrapper Mummification
Kike Ninja Squad
Cocko Bell
Nazibot Goes To Israel
May Caroline Cook-Off (A Yearly Showcase Of New And Traditional Drawerian Cuisine) (The Most "Popular" Attraction Is The Mystery Tasting Tent) (Be Warned: While Mystery Food Number Two May Tate Hot, Wet, And Meaty; It Is NOT, In Fact, Chili)
Mama May's Cum Drizzled Chili In A Can (Making Even Wendy's Chili Seem Delicious Since The Dawn of Time) (And Now Introducing Mama May's "Orange You Glad To Have Me Inside Of You?" Orange Juice) (Mama May's: "Mmmmm, It's Mandatory!")
Completeing Drawerientation (Once You Have Been In The Drawer For A Year (Drawerian Time) You Are Made To Rim A Fresh Load Of Herm Sperm Out Of The Ass Of Every Drawerian, Elite Guard, Dildonii, Herm Jr., and Finally Herm Itself)
I'm Gonna Batter Your Uterus Harder Than A Prime Mike Tyson (#SantorumSquadPickupLines)
Pooper Scooper Dick Remover (A Device Designed By Herm To Lop Off Drawerian Cocks And Fill The Empty Space With Scat)
Cumpiss (Instead Of Leading You North, It Points You Straight Towards Herm's Rectum)
Firing A Jet Stream Of Piss Directly Into Herm's Intestines (Just Another Day In The Life Of A Drawerian Bidet)
Completeing Drawerientation (Once You Have Been In The Drawer For A Year (Drawerian Time) You Are Made To Rim A Fresh Load Of Herm Sperm Out Of The Ass Of Every Drawerian, Elite Guard, Dildonii, Herm Jr., And Finally Herm Itself)
I'm Gonna Batter Your Uterus Harder Than A Prime Mike Tyson (#SantorumSquadPickupLines)
I Want Somebody To Look At Me Like Herm Looks At Taco Bell (#JustSSThings)
Herm's Favorite Sheddian Torture Method (Opening A Portal That Leads Out Into The Drawer And Waiting For Them To Sprint Towards It So He Can See The Look On Their Faces When He Switches The Portal Destination To His Scat-Caked Rectum) (And They Suddenly Realize They've Lost Control Of Their Legs)
You Do Not Fuck With The "Lady" Named May (Sometimes Instead Of Drawering You, She Will Maze You) (And The Exit Of The Maze Sends You Below Drawer Incorporated HQ)
Trump Goes Above And Beyond By Building A Wall Across The Atlantic To Keep The Shitskins Out
The Dildoctor (The Only Licensed Physician In The Drawer, And Therefore The Only One Qualified To Remove The Many Dildos That Are Stuck In Drawerian Anuses. However, Under Orders From Herm, He Must Put Two In For Each One He Takes Out) (He Is Also The One Who Will Perform Herm's Surgery)
CockMeBot (An Early Prototype Of Nazibot Captured By Drawer Incorporated Recon Teams And Modified For Herm's Pleasure)
Getting Your Arms Chopped Off And Shoved Up Herm's Ass Shoulder First (So Your Hands Clap For Him When He Twerks)
Day Old May Load (The Sight Is Nothing Compared To The Scent) (The Scent Is Nothing Compared To The Taste)
Mr. And Mrs. Hands (Herm Riding The Drawerse Riding You)
May Cook: The (Thankfully) Only Scatbender
May Spunk Removal Procedures (There's No Such Thing Because No One's Invented A Pump Strong Enough)
NTMAL (National Toungeing May's Anus League)
Chug E. Dickcheese
Fatally Fucked By May (It's A Long Way Up And A Slow Crawl Out Of The Drawer)
Gnashing May's Gash While Wearing His Pubes As A Moustache
Performing A McTwist Over The Dildocopter (That's The Worst Thing I've Ever Filmed!) (That's The Worst Thing Anybody's Ever Filmed!)
Herm's Erotic Coffee Shop (He'll Let You Cream Him As Long As He Gets His Black)
Taco Bell Burrito Shells Filled With Warm Scat
Four Herm "Pie" Eating Contest (Even Kane Can't Bring Himself To Love Those Poon-Tang Pies)
May Shedding Both His Clothes And His Parents
Urethral Rash (Explaining To The Doctor Why I Was Twirling A Flathead Screwdriver In My Cum Gun Isn't How I Pictured This Day Turning Out)
Herm Doing Naked Spin-A-Roonies On Your Front Lawn (The Drawerian Way To Start The Day)
Catching Herm's Surgically Removed Nuts In Your Mouth Like A Bloody Golden Snitch
Tentaclits (Octuple Penetrating A Singular Hole) (The First Release In A New Animated Porn Genre Known As "Hehe-ntai")
Getting Deepthroated By Herm So Hard That His Uvula Goes Into Your Urethra
Being Awakened By Herm Who Has Transformed Himself Into A Loli And Announced His Intention To Make You His "Girl-Cock's Pink Sock"
May's Gaping Dragon (The Hardest Fight In Dark Souls History) (To Date, No One's Ever Beaten It)
The Adventures Of Nazibot, S01E02: Meeting With /mu/tank
Mama Hermio Introducing Your Ass To His Goombella-Sized Cock Head (The Thousand Yard Dong: Part II)
May Puffing Up His Clit And Punching You In The Face With It Like A Sock'Em Bopper
Pisser-Shitting A May Sized Kidney Stone (That's No Stone, It's May's Newest Fetish)
Herm Raping Your Ass Like Golden State Rapes The NBA (Everyone Knows It's Going To Happen, The Only Point Of Uncertainty Is How Bad The Damage Will Be) (He's Gonna "Boogie" Inside You While Pretending Your Holes Are His Cousins)
Spunk Monk II: Enter The Cummy Mummy (The Greatest Cum-Fu Movie Of The Century)
Spunk Monk: The Two Wanged Warrior (The Battle Hardened Cum-Fu Hero Of Legend) (He Shoots His Chunks To Take Down Punks) (If You Come At Him Kicking, You'll Leave With A Dicking)
Jurassic Park It In My Ass (Herm's Newest Solo Video) (It's 3 Hours Of Him Dino-Dicking Himself To The Jurassic Park Theme)
Ovarian Caviar (Made Fresh From May's Menstrual Orbs)
Being Forced To Watch Herm Beat Off Into A Turkey Baster, Then Use Said Baster To Pump His Spooge Into One Of His Turds And Force-Feed It To You Like A Cadbury Egg
Islamic Autism (I've Counted And Listed All The Things In This Room I Can Turn Into A Bomb)
Brass Fuckles (Like Brass Knuckles But Instead Of Spikes They're Topped With Nine Inch Dildos)
I Sold My Anal Virginity For A Kia Cee Apostrophe D
Scatling Gun (20 Logs Launched Per Second)
May Commiting Penile Snuff To Gain A Muff
Maydolf Clitler
Molten "White Chocolate" Mudslide (The Age Of Manure Is Dead, The Age Of Spunkarrhea Begins)
Drawer Spice Herm Cum Blocker Body Butter (Blocks Herm Cum For 16 Drawerian Seconds, Might As Well Be An Eternity) (Two Problems With The Product: 1. It Costs Ten Million Hermbux For A One Ounce Bottle And Even The Most Upper Class Drawerians Make About Three Per Year. 2. When You Use It, Herm Edges Himself For 16 Seconds And Blows A Load On You Thrice As Big As The One You Would've Taken Normally)
Dick or Teet (Herm's Going As A Dominatrix This Year, Only So He Can Publicly Humiliate Autumn Who's Going Out In A Fursuit Based On Daisy)
Transsexual Black Belt (Karate Chop Your Penis Off)
Jackin' One Into May's Crack At 12:56 PM
May Performs Stand-Up Comedy (I Just Blew In From North Carolina And Boy Are My Lips Tired!) (He Was Physically Thrown From The Stage After Telling The Same Joke Sixty-Seven Times In A Row And Punctuating Each One With "Hehe")
May Crucifying Himself So You Can Shove Your Tongue Through The Hole In His Hand And Munch His Clit While He Fingerbangs Himself
Centipeen (One Hundred Ended Dildo)
Bimillipeen (Just Twenty Centipeens Taped Together) (What You Don't Realize Is That It's Flex Tape, And Phil Swift Is About To Stick Five Hundred Of Those Ends Up Each Of Your Asses)
Dildiarrhea (When May Fucks You So Hard And Deep With His Strap-On That It Liquifies The Shit In Your Colon And Sends It Firing Out At Mach Speeds) (Needless To Say, This Arouses Herm)
Eldritch Beastiality (When You Stare Into The Void And The Void Stares Back, So You Take The Next "Logical" Step And Whip Out Your Dick)
Tied Down And Intravenously Force-Fed Herm Spunkarrhea (What Passes For "Medical" "Care" In The Drawer)
Dick Tip Sal Flip (May Cook's Pro Skatter) (Every Song Is Replaced With Death Stare)
Unwanted Scrotal Piercing (Doing The Splits On A Bed Of Nails)
Pork-upine (The Day I Saw Herm's Dick Covered In Quills Is The Day I Realized How Fully God Had Abandoned Us)
Hydromiseónecrophilia (Hatefucking Bin Laden's Waterlogged Corpse)
Giving Birth By Firing The Child Out Of The Pussy Like A Railgun (Yeetus That Fetus)
Intestinal Burns From Shoving A Lava Lamp Up Your Ass (Just Because It Looks Like A Dildo, Doesn't Mean It Should Be Used As One) (Exhibit B: The Cactus)
Varg Fucks Euronymous To Death (I Thought, If He's Gonna Have A Dildo Bazooka, I'm Gonna Have A Dildo Bazooka)
Transsexual BBW Barbie Doll (Looks, Sounds, Feels, and Smells Exactly Like May Cook)
The Stank Wank Bank (Where Herm Connects Your Intestines To Your Penis And You Deposit Your Shit Cum Directly Into His Mouth) (It Should Go Without Saying At This Point, But In Case You Couldn't Figure It Out Yourself, It's Mandatory)
Doug Dimmadome's Universe Destroyer (The True Final Boss Of The Cosmos)
World of Drawercraft: Scataclysm (The Madness of Deathwang)
Drawerian Extreme Sports (Naked May On An ATV Doing A Superman Grab Off A Ramp While Popping A Wad On The Horrified Spectators Below
Beating Your Meat Like An Italian Beats His Wife (Salami Smackdown)
I Go Onto Indian Burial Grounds And Disturb The Bones To Get Some Ghost Tang
May's Girl Schlong In A Way-Too-Small Thong (In Other News, Herm Has Discovered A New Fetish In Urethral Flossing)
Hot Dog Related Self-Foreplay Accidents
Watching May's Flesh-Twinkie Pop And Leak In Your Mouth (Like A Throbbing Hairy Zit)
Double Slapped Across The Face By Herm's Post-Schlick Beef-Sheets (A Wet "Blanket" Welcome To The Drawer)
The Blindfolded Gloryhole Creampie Challenge (Spray And Pray That It's Not May)
The Scataclysm (20 Years And 10 Quintillion Dollars Worth Of Taco Bell Constipation Bursting Forth To Turn Your Face Into A Brown Pompeii)
Drawerian O-Face Contest (Herm's Won Every Year) (They Don't Call Him "Ahegao Ackers" For Nothing)
Poon Balloon (May's Urethral Inflation Fetish Has Reached New Levels Of Horror)
Disproving The Theory Of Relativity By Measuring The Speed At Which May Strips When He Comes Home To Autumn (Einstein Was A Faggot)
Herm's Guest Appearance In The New Dead Or Alive Extreme Beach Volleyball Game (8K Herm Jiggle Physics)
Impounded And Pounded (That Feel When Your Car Gets Towed To The Drawer)
Jerkin' & Twerkin' (Fap While You Make That Ass Clap)
The Human Hose (A New Application For The Human Centipede, Wherein Herm Vomits Into The Mouth Of The First Drawerian With Enough Pressure To Send It Out The Ass Of The Last Drawerian, Covering The Target(s) In His Septic Sauce)
Yardstick Dick (Smacking You On The Knuckles Like A Nun And Fucking You In The Ass Like A Priest)
The Autistic Bookkeeper Of The Drawer (A Rain Man-esque Servant Whose Job It Is To Follow Around RIC FLAYR And Note Down What He Says Into An Ever Expanding Borderline-Illegal Tome Of Dildonian Canon)
Getting Hit With May's Frontside Beaver Blast While He's On The Rag (Taking the Term "Crimson Mask" To A Whole New Level)
The Entirety of Cicero Avenue Along With Everyone Who Uses It Poorly Should Be Tied To A Rocket And Launched Into The Sun
Hillary Clinton Supporters And Frankly All Social Justice Warriors Should Be Tied To A Rocket And Launched Into The Sun
Anyone Who Is Currently Friends With May Michele Marquidhepbdft (I Can't Spell That Shit Nor Do I Care Enough To Learn) Should Be Tied To A Rocket And Launched Into The Sun
The Entire State Of California Along With Everyone Who Lives There Should Be Tied To A Rocket And Launched Into The Sun
Each And Every Manhole On Ogden Avenue Should Be Tied To A Rocket And Launched Into The Sun (And Then Paved Over So I Can Drive On That Road Without Ruining My Fucking Suspension)
The Entire Restaurant Industry And The Labor Laws Which It Refuses To Adhere To Should Be Tied To A Rocket And Launched Into The Sun
Anyone Who Brakes Unnecessarily On The Highway Should Be Tied To A Rocket And Launched Into The Sun (You're Causing Traffic Jams, You Stupid Piece of Shit) (If The Semis Don't Have To Slow Down For That Corner Then Neither Do You You Yeasty Cunt of a Minivan Driver)
You Should Be Tied To A Rocket And Launched Into The Sun (RIP Seth Putnam)
The Mainstream Media Should Be Tied To A Rocket And Launched Into The Sun
Anyone Who Drives Less Than 70 Miles Per Hour In The Left Lane Of The Highway Should Be Tied To A Rocket And Launched Into The Sun
Anyone Who Ships Something In Anything Other Than A Cardboard Box Should Be Tied To A Rocket And Launched Into The Sun (Looking Directly At You Macy's, With Your Plastic Bag Shit) (When Amazon Finally Puts You Out Of Business I'll Smile)

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Friends Coming Over For India Vs Australia ODI? Here’s How You Can Throw A Kickass Houseparty Under Rs 4,000 – Indiatimes.com

> Friends Coming Over For India Vs Australia ODI? Here’s How You Can Throw A Kickass Houseparty Under Rs 4,000 PARTNER Friends Coming Over For India Vs Australia ODI? Here’s How You Can Throw A Kickass Houseparty Under Rs 4,000 SAVE India is all set to take on Australia in the ODI series, starting Saturday, March 2. It’s a weekend, and it’s going to be a great match that definitely calls for a houseparty with some close friends, cheering together for Kohli and Dhoni.
And while you love having your friends over and partying hard, you are slightly worried about the finances. But there is no need to fret. Who says a good host can’t be a smart one too? All you have to do is follow these steps and host a kickass houseparty that won’t burn your pocket. 1. Hit up a party supplies store instead of buying decorations online
Unsplash
One of the main things to keep in mind while throwing a house party is the decoration. Since it is the big game night, we suggest stock up on some amazing decorations and banners of the Indian cricket team from a local party supplies store, instead of buying the same stuff online at a higher rate. If you’re smart, you can get your hands of awesome party essentials for as low as Rs 500. Make sure to deck up the place with blue streamers and balloons, and get hold of posters of your favourite players. 2. BYOB – Bring your own beverage
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If you are thinking of arranging beverages for some 10 odd people, drop the idea right now! It is going to drive up your costs unnecessarily. Besides, you may not even be sure about people’s preferences. Solution? Make the party BYOB and don’t worry about it one bit. 3. Potluck to the rescue
Taco Bell
As a host, you would probably want to arrange all the food, all by yourself. But let’s be honest. Neither you have the time to cook food for so many guests nor would the plan fit your budget. So make your house party a potluck, and it’ll be great fun too. People usually love bringing their food over.
What you can definitely do is, try and mix it up a little with Mexican cuisine. How about tacos and wraps from Taco Bell? We hear their Chickstar wrap (for Rs 169) is to die for! The wrap is star-shaped and is generously filled with crispy chicken, creamy habanero, veggies and nacho cheese sauce. For vegetarians, they have the Vegstar wrap for Rs 149 which is equally mouthwatering and scrumptious.
The best part though? These wrap come with free unlimited Pepsi. So it seems like you have managed to sort out food and beverages like a total pro, and you are still left with extra funds! 4. Go for disposable cutlery
Starpakas
We all have scary, party stories of drunk guests breaking cutlery and making a mess of the house. You would definitely don’t want that. Disposable cutlery sets are affordable, don’t involve breaking and, most importantly, you don’t have to do worry about doing the dishes post party. 5. Get Super-Cool Jerseys
There is no way you are going to watch the ODI match and not be wearing jerseys. It’s a tradition. Although, instead of buying high-end jerseys, go to a your closest local sports store and get a great deal on a bulk of Indian jerseys. Sounds like a deal?
Now that you’re all set for the big India versus Australia ODI match this Sunday, start making your guest list already.

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Eagle News Online – C-NS Festival of Nations is March 7

More than 25 countries will be represented at the fourth annual Festival of Nations, which will be held at Cicero-North Syracuse High School on March 7. (Submitted photo) By Ashley M. Casey Associate Editor Imagine if there were no opportunities to try out other cultures’ delicacies, or to learn a new language, or to see a talented group of dancers celebrating their heritage. The hora! Fortunately, you’ll have the chance to witness the hora — a traditional Jewish-Israeli dance — as well as taste authentic cuisine and put those Duolingo hours to good use at the fourth annual Festival of Nations at Cicero-North Syracuse High School next Thursday. James Corl III, now a junior at C-NS, has headed up the festival since he was an eighth-grader at North Syracuse Junior High School. He said the festival has doubled in size since its inception. More than two dozen countries will be represented at this year’s festival. “I think one of the great things about this festival is we’ve added something new every year. The second year we added a lot more countries. The first year we had 12; the second year we had 15 or 16,” Corl said. “This year we’re bringing in outside groups to represent countries.” One such outside guest is St. Mary and St. Mina Coptic Orthodox Church of North Syracuse. The church hosts its own Egyptian festival each year and welcomed its global leader, Pope Tawadros II, last September. “I think it’s great that they’re coming in and sharing their culture with us,” Corl said. Keyna Hora Klezmer will perform traditional Yiddish and Eastern European Jewish folk music and dances, and the Syracuse Scottish Pipe Band will blare its bagpipes. The Enzian Bavarian Band and Folk Dancers will perform polkas, waltzes and other traditional German dances. “I’m really glad that we’re able to have such diversity in the dance groups,” Corl said. “I always try to bring in groups that aren’t necessarily represented.” The festival is student-run. More than half of the booths will be operated by students representing their own cultures. Among those countries are Cuba, the Dominican Republic, South Sudan and Nigeria. “All of these countries either these kids came from or their parents are from so they’re all first-generation or second-generation,” Corl said. Other booths are run by students who simply took an interest in a particular country or culture and decided to research it. “Students come out of the woodwork and they volunteer,” he said. Typically, Corl said, each country is represented by a booth with a trifold display of facts about the nation, articles of traditional clothing or other artifacts, and, of course, a sample of a dish from the culture. “Last year, from Palestine grape leaves were offered — those were delicious,” Corl said. Corl said he hopes the Festival of Nations will teach people about the different cultures that make up their community and broaden their perspective. “My favorite part is just seeing the community come together not only to acknowledge the cultures [but also] seeing them step outside their comfort zone,” he said. “I’ll never forget the first time I tried authentic Indian food at our first festival. It’s more than ‘the Taj Mahal is there’ and ‘cows are sacred.’ Each person has their own story.” The Festival of Nations takes place from 5:30 to 7:30 p.m. Thursday, March 7, in the cafeteria at Cicero-North Syracuse High School, located at 6002 Route 31 in Cicero. It is free and open to the public. Related

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